Count My Blessing in Sabah: The Beginning

I was all set up for it. Yet the map is still undiscovered.

' Inday,  I keluar dating ya.'  I jokes to her. This look may seem plain but it is full of emotion! Excited,  waiting,  hoping,  wonder.. mixed Feeling like a little girl who is waiting to watch the movie for the first time with her dad. Actually,  I couldn't think of anyone else whom I could spend  my two free MBo tickers with. A friend suggested a brilliant idea that I should try take my father out to watch movie. So,  this happen and funny that he likes Stephen Chow movie. mermaid happens to be on show.

Happy Chap Goh Meh But I am feeling meh..🙄 Mata bagi saman Ang Pau kena makan The year of monkey Start with no money Beli lottery Tak semestinya jadi Heart break kao kao Tak ape lah Go minum milo super kao And makan nian gao bah This poem is to remember the agony of paying a parking fine using my Cny money pocket for the first time in KK.

For everything God created is good, and nothing is to be rejected if it is received with thanksgiving,-  1 Timothy 4:4 Rusty.. it's been awhile I last wrote a poem. But I will try and I will write about God's creation. While I count my steps as I walk nearer to the sea A special spot seem to be waiting for me An aged log longs for a seated wear There, I let the strong breeze sweep my hair Where do I begin cherishing what I see Those gifts of beauty God set before me I am glad that I made time for Him He comforts me through thick and thin Why are things the way they are? Heart-shaped leaves edge the shore to the end The long curly and foamy waves roaring  by the sound of the wind Still, the vast blue sky quiets the horizon with cottony clouds Soaring by above is an eagle gliding high in its wing spread wide Curious crabs scurry left to right across the sand bed Two white storks clench onto a swaying boat Beside them a man with a pointed straw hat Trying t...

I celebrated the day simple and meaningful. The night before I wrote couple of things down to do for the following the day. They were: 1. Get myself first manicure done. 2. Treat myself to Japanese lunch. 3. Get flowers for mom. 4. Just chill at a new place and enjoy company 5. Dinner at Archies de Corner with  cousins. Highlight: 1, I used to wonder what it was like to get a manicure done. I saw how other ladies enjoyed it very much. While it is late, I managed to experience it and seeing my nails being pampered. I realized how precious my hands are and praised them for having done so many things in the past. I always fail to give them credit. Looking at them made me see the potential I have had and have in me. Breakthrough: 1. There was always a fear in me when I wanted to visit mom on the hill. I made it safe today alone when carefully walked past other chambers and finally placed the bouquet of flower which I bought earlier, on her bed. I wouldn't be here if no...

I will write about how my last day of being 30 was like... Time flies... The last 14 days have been amazing. If I don't recall,  maybe I wouldn't have acknowledge God's blessing on me. Actually, I hadn't feel alone at all but I thought otherwise. And today turned my negative perspective  180 degree. Days have been filled with the presence of loved ones. God has always been comforting me all along. It is good thing that I recognised His love through the people He sent to me since the last week of January. It was beyond my expectation. All started with Joon Kee,  Juin,  Tze Feng,  Thong Wei Li,  and Lok Yukians as the appetiser.. .. then the Cny started with relatives,  family and cousins... as the main course ... attending Mei Yong''s open house and having watch lion dance + firecrackers .. ending with dessert my celebration of early birthday surprised by my brother himself on Valentine... While i went through this,  I reflected that...

Comfortably feeling my full tummy,  feeling the soft bed,  I relaxed to reading drama cap series. In the background,  firecrackers sounded in the air. The sudden gun liked bang made my heart leaps. I wondered why this time I find them pleasing to the ears and heart. Each bang seem to mark the end of something - trying to figure out - the heart cheered along as I saw the colorful crackers in the sky. It is peculiar this time I found reasons to enjoy hearing them.  Before they meant nothing to my heart because there was nothing to celebrate about... since grieving over my mother last year.  But now,  I felt the still moment,  that every year I stayed in the same place to hear these firecrackers,  they are constant but the mind,  heart and soul seemed to change.  I felt that I had been brought back to past time,  the mind reminded to 3 years back and fast forwarded now,  everything  I felt about those years melted away....

I really miss her. I guess she means a lot to me. The longer a friendship with someone,  the harder the separation. Her presence is an evidence of my once lived life in Sandakan.  It just felt like a dream to be with her. Why am I being so blessed by her? What does it mean to be with her?  Is life better with just watching others moving on while I remain stagnant? Is my time right being here? Seeing  many really encourages to start thinking about my future - can I dare to wish for oversea again? Is enjoying each other present is what I meant to do first for now. Where are we both heading? As long  as I believe that we will meet again when we are willing to spend the time and energy. Our friendship is marked by the memories we had done together. That is the depth of our friendship.  We change perspective but not the ties between us.  I remember the time we always have lunch together in school. I remember we always walked to class from class. I remembe...